CAKEAPOTAMUS

Friday, September 25, 2015

The T-Shirt Correlation

I want to talk to you today about Walmart t-shirts.

I love Walmart t-shirts.

You know what I'm talking about. Those $4 t-shirts that are stacked (sometimes) neatly on the table and come in every color of the rainbow. I love those things. I buy them all the time. I work with a lot of bleach and food coloring and mess here at the bakery so I destroy t-shirts fairly regularly. The cheap t-shirts are great to wear to the bakery because I don't care if they get covered in black Americolor or the bleach sink splashes all over me. They're not special- they're cheap. And they're great for everyday bakery work.

Now, if I'm feeling particularly whimsical, I might venture into the $9 t-shirt department and get a shirt with a Star Wars logo on it. Or a pink Halloween shirt. But even at $9, I know these are cheap shirts. I don't expect them to last long and I won't be too upset if bleach burns a hole in them.

The thing about the Walmart t-shirt is that I get what I get. If they have a purple shirt in my size, I can get a purple shirt. If they don't have a purple shirt in my size, I can't get a purple shirt. I am choosing from a stack of mass-produced shirts that came in off a truck and have been looked at (or tried on) by I-don't-know-how-many people.

I don't get to choose when my shirt was made.
I don't get to choose what my shirt is made of.
I don't get to choose who makes my shirt.
I don't get to choose how my shirt is decorated.
I don't get to have the shirt made to fit me just right.

But it's cheap! I get what I pay for.

Now, if I wanted to choose when, how, and by whom my shirt is made, I could find a custom t-shirt maker. I could pick out fabric and get the t-shirt made to my exact measurements. I could choose the colors and style and how it's made. I could choose a custom t-shirt maker who is experienced, insured, licensed, and who has a portfolio of t-shirts that show this t-shirt maker is capable of making the t-shirt I want.

Of course, if I were getting a custom t-shirt made, I would expect it to cost more than $4 or $9. After all, the materials are of a higher quality, the shirt won't be mass-produced in a factory- it'll be made just for me. And the t-shirt designer would probably expect to be paid for their time and expertise. The custom t-shirt would probably be pretty expensive- I shouldn't wear it to make cakes. It's definitely a special occasion t-shirt- for weddings, birthdays, or bar mitzvahs. Or maybe I'll wear it on a Tuesday, just to feel special. But it's a special t-shirt, custom made, just for me. It's not going to be as cheap as a Walmart shirt.

Walmart also sells cakes. I'll let you fill in the appropriate conclusions.

Monday, September 21, 2015

Well, That Was Interesting...

The last few weeks at the bakery have been unusually full of cameras. Big cameras. I was on the news a couple of times. Once for our involvement with Icing Smiles and once as a bakery profile. That was pretty cool.



Then, this weekend, we had an entire production crew at the bakery filming... things. For... reasons. I'm not allowed to talk much about it yet, but I can share some pictures from it! So here:

The days started early. This is a big camera to have in your face at early o'clock:


There was a lot of gear.

And I heard a lot of, "Say that again, " "Say that as a complete sentence," "Say that without any football words," and "I gotta fix your mike."

I got to wrap a microphone around my daughter's thigh. That was a new one.

There was a cake involved, but it didn't turn out quite like I wanted. But that's ok. They still ate it.

And then there was this:





I sometimes wonder if my kids go to school and talk about what they did over the weekend. And then I wonder if their teachers believe them.
"I had a tea party with Star Wars characters."
Then, another party! What party would be complete without Darth Vader?



Then, it was over to the hotel for the interview portion. You know that part of tv shows where the person is sitting in front of a plain background, talking about what's happening? Yeah, those lights are bright. And that part takes a while, y'all! I think we were there for two hours for that part. It looked like this:

Actually, I took out my phone to take a picture of what I was looking at and these two made these faces for me. Charming, no?

Now it's the worrying part where I wonder what that mike caught when I forgot I was wearing it. And how did we look? And how many lame puns will they have to edit out? And how judgy will people be about that cake? And I'm sorry about that joke I told. And I hope they got something usable out of this. But not too much. And I hope they've forgotten about that thing that happened. And my kids loved this crew! But I wonder how it's going to come out.

I'll let you know when I'm allowed to say what we did and I'll share it when it's available online... unless I look ridiculous in which case I'll pretend it never happened.